Its so great when you have a best friend, you go shopping together, movies, clubbing, sleepovers etc. Now what happens when a boy comes along & steals away all your precious time together & to add salt to your wounds, you HATE HIM!
I have to say a few of my friends have dated unsavoury guys, the odd one even tried it on with me, WTF??? So what do you do when your in this position? You hate your bff’s boyfriend but she’s loved up with him. Here are some tips to think over as to why you feel this way & what you can do about it.
1. Why don’t you like him? First ask what is causing your unease? Are you just jealous he now has her time & your left out or is he treating her bad & being disrespectful? Its not easy sharing & sometimes we can be a little selfish, but if your friend is genuinely happy then you should also be happy for her & when she finally comes up to breath make sure you don’t make her feel bad for not calling. The beginning of a relationship is the most exciting time, I’m sure you will understand when its your turn.
2. Be polite. No one likes to be around someone who make things awkward, or makes snide comments every-time her boyfriend says something. You must be respectful to your friend. You may think they don’t see you rolling your eyes or hear your snide remarks under your breath, but they surely do. Maybe they don’t say anything to you right there & then, but your friend will certainly after he’s gone. Your girl would never put up with her guy disrespecting you, so don’t disrespect him either. You don’t have to play phony, but fix your face and play nice, you dont want to loose your best friend do you?
3. Don’t avoid your friend when she is with her man. It can be tempting to avoid any situation when you have to see the person you highly dislike, but you don’t want to alienate your friend. Instead of cancelling dinner or party plans because you know she’ll be there with him, go anyway. Distancing yourself from her, because of him, is a no-no. Your friend shouldn’t be punished because of her relationship choices. If it feels too awkward being the third wheel, hang out in a larger group.
4. Don’t trash-talk the relationship. As tempting as this can be, especially to your other close friends & anyone who will listen, avoid at all costs. Of course you want to be honest with your friend, but that doesn’t mean you should constantly discuss your dislike for their partner. She gets it. You don’t like him, but no need to remind her of it every day. Constantly downing a friends relationship will just put a strain on the friendship. And, if need be, politely ask your friend to keep from venting to you about him. She’s your girl so you’ll always offer a shoulder to cry on, but if she runs down every wrong that he commits, you’ll just add it to your check-list of reasons to dislike ol’ boy even more. If he really is a jackass it will only be a matter of time before your back to hitting the town together & she cant remember what she ever saw in him. Even then don’t be tempted to vent every little thing you disliked about him or how badly she acted, keep it brief, be constructive & enjoy how your friendship keeps growing.
Have you ever been in this situation, what did you do?