OK ladies, so I was talking with one of my male friends the other day, a certain Mr X, (yes I interrogate every man so I can bring you ladies the answers lol) I was chatting about black women and our hair. This topic is really about things that shouldn’t be done early on when dating a new boyfriend.
So here’s the thing, you know when you just had your hair freshly did, looking hot as you do ;p or just in general a lot of black women wrap their hair up at night to maintain their style, stop breakage etc, Well a lot of men don’t actually like the look of their girl when she’s wearing this, they find it a huge turn off. Lets just say it kinda kills the dream! When you begin a new relationship, us ladies really go to town with our appearance, always looking on point. Things go really well, you start seeing each other even more. He then begins to invite you over to stay or vice versa.
Then a little into the relationship things start to get a little comfy, which is not a bad thing as you like each other BUT then you start to think OK, we know each other now, especially if your dating a black guy, he should understand that black women wrap their hair. But girls here’s the thing men don’t understand (well not at the beginning anyway) i remember doing this with an ex two weeks into a relationship and the guy gave me some funny looks but didn’t say anything. This is what some men don’t like. It kinda goes like this. IF your man is going to see you for the evening or for the weekend especially in the golden early days, the least you can do is look your best and keep this up for as LONG as possible. Men don’t like to see women get “comfortable” too early on. They want to believe that you look that hot effortlessly, they want to see all your beauty and watch you whilst you sleep with your hair curled up beneath your head. They get freaked out if you look like some aunty Matilda and please step away from adding old track suit bottoms or big flumpy pyjamas into the equation lol. Your sex appeal and x factor goes out the window. They don’t care how sexy you think your “good” head scarf is, in fact they would love it if you burned it! lol
Sometimes ladies you have to sacrifice that new £60 fresh hair or how ever much you paid. I tried wrapping my hair at night but it gave me bad headaches and I could never lock down the correct technique, plus it wasn’t part of my culture as I didn’t have black friends in Scotland to show me, till I moved to London and then my new friends showed me how to do it. I tried it for a while but my scarf always ended up unravelled when I woke up lol.
And yes, men should know that we don’t look that hot all the time, it takes maintenance, but many men will agree that they do not want to see women in head scarf’s or white cream on top of your spots (LMAO thats another blog) especially early on in a relationship. How early is early? About a good year should do it. This is the most crucial and exciting part of a new relationship and should be relished for as long as possible. Keep it sexy. Let the man see you in all your hotness. Men only want to see the great parts, so you have to gently ease in the no make up, track suit bottoms and head scarf’s, especially in doing so all in one go. Don’t kill the hot dream too early on ladies. Remember usually at bedtime there’s no make up so adding the wrap could be a little too much for your man to see at the early stage. Let him be truly smitten to the point of no return THEN you can do your thang, this is the wise words from the men I have spoken too on this topic. So there you have it and hey there’s nothing wrong with wanting to look hot for your man, its never a good idea to get too comfy too early on. Even in long term relationships its wise to keep up effort every now and then.
Do you think men, especially black men should not care about females wearing a head scarfs to bed?
Do you wear one, what does your man think?