OK, OK I admit it, even I have been a lil green eyed over a friends hot new outfit with her perfect bod when I’m feeling a bloated mess, (damn her ;p) but some female “friends” can take it too far. Have you ever felt that your friend “MIGHT” be jealous of you, but you quickly dismissed the thought because you told yourself, “She’s my friend, she loves me…she would NEVER be jealous of me…how could I think such a thing! In my younger teens I had a friend who use to be very competitive, had to be the centre of attention. If I had bought something nice for myself or got a new haircut she would be grudgingly shrug her shoulders & say “yeah its OK” and be in a quite mood for the evening. Unfortunately some girls never grow out of this childish behaviour and even in adult hood carry this nonsense on. It can be frustrating if you have a friend who’s a hater rather that a congratulator, the reason we stay their friend is because, when there not in this mood they are actually really great company! So what’s the best way to remain friends without having them ruin your good mood or have another argument about there hating attitude? Oh & maybe we should check ourselves to see if we do any of the following oops lol
Understand your friend’s feelings. Jealous friends envy you because they wish they had what you had. Decide whether your friend is insecure about her love life, looks, income, clothes, intelligence or something else. Think about whether your friend would be more secure if she had what she envies, or if you suspect she’d still find something to be jealous about & whether she’s a friend better kept at arms length
Call your friend on her jealous behaviour. If she rolls her eyes when you order an ice cream or burger & fries because she’s always on a diet, tell her point blank that you’re going to enjoy your food/dessert whether she rolls her eyes or not, that’s not to say you cant be supportive of her. If she teases you about your new jewellery or dress, tell her you love your brand new things & she shouldn’t have to worry since she’s not wearing it. Be confident rather than apologizing for making her jealous, since her jealousy isn’t your fault.
If you think its just a phase, help your friend to be more secure. Her insecurities should be painfully obvious by her jealous behaviour–so build her up so she feels better about herself. Compliment her for what she does have going for her, and help him build an action plan so that she can get what she wants. If she envies your ease with men, help her find more dates. Maybe she just needs a boost because she doesn’t know how to come out of her shell around other people & you do. Remind her you wouldn’t be friends if you didn’t think she was a nice person at heart
Stand up to rude behaviour. Just because your friend feels bad about her lack of education or career goals, doesn’t mean she can call you a nerd for wanting to study or achieve. Demand an apology and if you don’t get one, it might be time to part ways. Don’t let someone’s insecure opinion ruin your chances at a great future, especially when you know your doing good things. This is usually a fear you may leave them behind or just how bad they are doing at setting there own achievements or lack of discipline.
Expect all of your friends to support you through good times and bad. Your friend might be jealous that you’ve found a great man, lost weight or found a wonderful new job and she’s not, but if she doesn’t genuinely congratulate you, she’s not a good friend, simple as. This is not good friend material either. Life is hard enough sometimes without the people we think we can turn to or share with not giving us support, so the decision is yours. keep them in your life, keep them at arms length or let them grind you down. Sometimes its us who need to walk away until they can prove they value the friendship you should have.
Have you ever been in this situation how did you handle it? drop me a comment below x