Please don’t take the title of this post as me saying it is okay to subject the world to your emotional roller coaster. This is not an excuse to wollow in self pity. As we are about trying to help each other through challenges that our lives are subjected to.
Also note that by feeling a certain way other people may get a different perception or interpretation of you during your crisis if you are trying to hide your feelings. Which you and I know is very difficult when you are in a state of sadness or depression.
However, apologizing for how you feel will get you no where. You can apologize for you how you act. You can apologize for how you treat people. But your feelings are your feelings and sometimes a good cry is all that’s needed to dust yourself off and then continue with your day. Crying releases a lot of that negative energy holed up inside, which is why us women can handle emotional stress a lot better then our male counterparts.
The no apologies thing hit me about a year ago when I was on the train. I was thinking about conversations I’d had the past days and about I chat I received that morning. One of the girls asked about my love life and I told her all was well. (but I was lying) That time until recently I was in a relationship with someone I thought I could trust but then their true colours came out and that was that. (but I had already fallen in love ,cant go into details that will be another blog) So I was on the train trying to figure out why did everything seem so good? Where did it all go wrong? Anyway this had an effect on me and on how interacted with people and how my persona was seen by the outside world (its hard to hide things like these) I’m not open with much people when it comes to bad news so I didn’t tell anyone cause I use to feel bad for others time and space if I poured out my emotions. But then you get the “you alright?…what’s wrong?….you don’t seem yourself… questions which come every 5 minutes which doesn’t help.
Anyway I’ve learned to acknowledge and accept how I feel about situations like these instead of fighting and hiding. The latter approach is too draining and leads to chaos. So its best just to let it out and then people can give you some breathing space.
My feelings are not for other folks to agree with and they aren’t for me to push on other people. My job is not to feel bad for feeling or to apologize for having emotions. My job is to accept them cause that’s the first step to feeling better. So when a situation comes knocking on your door which you can’t control and crushes your emotions, have a good cry, let it out you will feel so much better, trust me, then take it from there ;]